Welcome to Fairy Boot Kamp ladies. I hope you
kissed your girlfriend's goodbye, because you won't be needing them here. You're mine now. I will drill you. I will train you. Until the last vestige of mindless aggression has been extinguished from your core. You will wake up fabulous. You will go to sleep fabulous. You will become loving machines capable of transforming your enemies into enlightened, iridescent beings. We will begin with some de-regimentation calisthenics.
Now dance like you've got a pair!
Cue music.
Sir, this girl's dead, and her guts are kind of hanging out.
Trench is over there private Slavostat. Why are you bothering me with this?
Time to play “Wheel of Propaganda”. George, as the son of a former champion, you get to go first. Go ahead motherfucker,
give the wheel a spin.
Police States Are Like Bad Anal Sex!
I Feel Your Pain! But can you keep your fucking guts to yourself kid?
I'm so glad in America we rejected all that silly, Old Europe, dynasty stuff. Whew… aren't we progressive now?
Damage report Scotty!
Aye Captain, the Bill of Rights is badly damaged now sir, and the entire Constitution will crumble soon, if we can’t get this mutant shrubbery out of the Hyper Drive!
Check out Gnarlene's naughty new album,
"That's So GAY" at: cdbaby.com/gnarlene
George Bush's Report Card:
Plays well with others; F
Contols irrational impulses; F
World History; F
Economics; F
Dodgeball; A
Notes:
Mrs. Bush,
It is the opinion of the entire school board that George is criminally insane and a danger to the other students. He will be expelled immediately. Good day madam.
Gnarlene Supreme, John Waters,
School monitors
Maybe all this is some prelude to Jesus comin back dude. Like a freakin assed bible movie but with real fucking dead people yo.
Why the fuck don't those Arab assed motherfuckers just lay down and fucking die? What is their fucking problem?
Give a hoot. Please don't shoot.
Nutty nutty world. Must go to pharmacy and get expensive brain medications. Where is the remote?
I grew up on war. This is old news to me.
This just in… it seems a right wing military dictatorship has taken over the United States government. Light resistance was reported from irregular resistance groups, but the operation is supposed to be mopped up soon. Stay tuned for breaking details. Now this.
And all this is making the world better and safer how again? I'm confused.
Bush: This war will not be over until it's done. Until the last motherfucker in that God forsaken country accepts my rule or dies!
Jesus. These pro-lifers got some fucking therapy sessions coming.
I'm for Bush. Democracy was a childish dream.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. All good things must come to an end. And so it is with sorrow and heavy hearts, that we bid our beloved, dearly departed freedoms goodbye forever.
Say it loud. Say it proud. I'm a stupid
brainwashed cow!
When did democracy become illegal?
I didn't vote for that shit.
It would have been bad enough just having to look at that asshole for four fucking years.
Freedom fries, while Iraqi's die.
WAKE UP OR DIE!
This is the moral equivalent of the holocaust! And we're the Germans!
Miss Thing. Could you tell me where us homo's are supposed to get gassed at?
At least we have decent, honest, compassionate leaders in charge of this unfortunate world crisis.
I hear they're trying to put a missile rider on the Patriot II act. At least our domestic policy is sane.
Fuck dude. I was still tripping on Patriot Act I.
Practice random acts of subversion,
and patriotic attacks on fascism.
Not another brainwashed sucker!
If I had a nickel for every closed and shallow mind…
This is your brain. This is your software upgrade. Keep reading.
And the winner of the Miss Information 2003 beauty pageant…it was a close one folks…. FUX Network News!
Attack Iraq? I'd rather snack.
Support our troops. We need to spread the guilt around.